In my last article, I talked about the worry many parents share: “Will my money ruin my kids?” The truth is, money itself won’t ruin them; it’s how it’s handled, shared, and taught that makes the difference.
But what if your children aren’t kids anymore? What if they’re part of Generation X, the group now between 45 and 60 years old, and closest to traditional retirement age?
New surveys suggest that Gen Xers may be facing more financial challenges than any other generation, and many are struggling to feel confident about their financial future. If you’re a parent of someone in this age group, here’s what you need to know and how you can help without “ruining” them in the process.
The Gen X Squeeze
Generation X is often called the “sandwich generation.” They may still be raising kids of their own, or supporting them through college, while also caring for aging parents. At the same time, they’re looking ahead and realizing that retirement isn’t decades away anymore.
According to Bankrate:
- 69% of Gen Xers feel they are behind on retirement savings.
- Nearly half (47%) say they’re significantly behind.
- Only 19% feel “very confident” they’ll be able to maintain their lifestyle in retirement.
Cerulli Associates found similar results, noting that two-thirds of Gen X 401(k) participants have less than $100,000 saved for retirement. That’s not nearly enough to fund decades of life after work.
It’s no wonder this generation feels squeezed.
Where Parents Fit In
For many successful families, these numbers raise an important question: If my child is behind, should I step in to help?
Here’s the challenge: simply writing a check doesn’t fix the problem. In fact, it risks creating dependence or resentment. The goal isn’t to bail out your adult children, it’s to give them tools, support, and wisdom so they can stand on their own.
Here are a few ways parents can help without “ruining” their Gen X children:
1. Have Honest Conversations
Don’t assume your children are fine, or that they’ll ask for help if they’re not. Open the door for honest conversations about money, retirement, and goals. Sometimes, just knowing you’re willing to talk about it takes away shame or fear.
2. Encourage Professional Guidance
Nearly 60% of Gen Xers don’t have a financial advisor. Many don’t know where to start. Helping them find a trustworthy advisor, without imposing one, can give them access to planning, tax strategies, and retirement options they may never explore on their own.
3. Offer Partnership, Not a Payout
If you provide financial support, connect it with partnership. For example, helping with a down payment, business idea, or large purchase should come with conversations and accountability. This mirrors the “teach and share wisdom” approach, not just “give and walk away.”
4. Share Your Own Story
Your experience matters. Sharing how you approached saving, investing, or even financial mistakes you’ve made can be just as powerful as any gift. Remember: information is everywhere, but wisdom is priceless.
5. Think in Terms of the Four Inheritances
As I’ve written before, a true inheritance isn’t just money, it’s:
- What you know (wisdom and lessons),
- What you do (habits and actions),
- What you give (values and causes), and
- What you have (wealth and assets).
When you bring all four into the conversation, you give your children confidence, not just cash.
The Bottom Line
Gen Xers may feel squeezed, but it’s not too late for them to build security. Compounding, catch-up contributions, delaying Social Security, and working with advisors can all make a meaningful difference.
As a parent, your role isn’t to rescue your children; it’s to empower them. By sharing wisdom, encouraging good advice, and offering support with purpose, you can help your Gen X children step into retirement with more confidence… and without unintentionally “ruining” them with money. If we can ever be a resource, we’re here to help!
